Because of some requests that I had from readers and student's parents I’m going to start doing a weekly parent tip section every Wednesday.
This week I want to talk about Picking Your Battles. It’s so easy to constantly try to be a puppeteer in our children’s lives. This is one of the main reasons for power struggles between children and parents. So it’s very important for us to pick our battles.
By picking battles I mean looking at the children’s behavior and picking the behavior that we feel is the most important to correct. Sometimes, we tried to correct too many things in our children’s behavior at one time whether to important or not.
In my experience as a martial arts instructor and teaching hundreds of kids, I realized to facilitate the parents goals of creating better behavior that it is important to work on one behavior at a time. Of course, we want to work on the behavior that we feel is the most important then create a plan to in our mind to correct this behavior.
By creating a personal improvement plan, we can proactively respond to inappropriate behavior, instead of just reacting to it. If we do not plan are responsive in advance, it’s easy to get frustrated and fall back on negative, unproductive responses like nagging, arguing, and cajoling.
In future weeks, we will talk about some strategies to employ to productively correct these unwanted behaviors.
But... until then... remember to Pick your Battles carefully.